20.05.2016 10:19

Who should I leave the child with? This is a question faced by many parents who find themselves in a situation where they need to go to work, go to the hospital, or go away on business. It is especially difficult for families in which a child is raised by one parent or if a child with disabilities is growing up in the family.

The “Respite” program started at the Otradnoe family and childhood support resource center and was first addressed to families with children with disabilities. Recently, the program can be used by all families who find themselves in difficult life situations. Currently, the project is being implemented in 29 family and children support centers in different districts of Moscow.

“I am a Parent” met with the head of one of the departments of social support for families and children, Svetlana Pavlovna Uvarova, who shared the first results of the experiment.

Project goal and objectives

The “Respite” program has existed since 2012 and includes short-term groups for children from 9.00 to 13.00 on weekdays. This is not an alternative to either a kindergarten or a school, since the department of social support for families is not an educational institution. However, thanks to “Respite”, parents have the opportunity to leave their child under the supervision of specialists and. If a child has problems with behavior or psychological development, then they also try to solve them in groups. In addition, as part of the project, mothers and fathers themselves receive psychological support and learn to remain attentive parents even in difficult life situations.

Specialists from the family support department admit that it is not true that people have an innate parental instinct. Sometimes you need to wake him up and explain the simplest things: how important it is to hug your child, listen to what worries him, and read a fairy tale at night.

How are classes going?

Depending on the situation within the program, you can leave the child in the group one or several times, or you can take him there constantly (for example, when the child cannot attend kindergarten or school due to health conditions). Psychologists and teachers will work with him and will be tasked with the following:

• psychological and social preparation of the child for school;
• development and acquisition of basic ideas about the world around us and what awaits the child when he starts school;
• creative activities through art therapy and the use of other techniques.

The child’s stay in the group begins with communication between specialists and parents to clarify individual characteristics and situations that occurred the day before or are occurring in general with the child. Next comes exercise, followed by developmental classes and group communication. Then creative studios, work with psychologists and speech therapists. An individual schedule is drawn up for each child, which includes the time for attending a particular class.

Here is just a partial list of activities that can be assigned to a child:

• art studio "Renaissance" - drawing therapy based on fine art;
• studio “Living Library” - bibliotherapy, where the main task of the specialist is the development of the child through cognition;
• music therapy - the development of the child’s psycho-emotional sphere through playing the guitar in the “Strings of the Soul” studio and choral singing in the “Rassvet” studio;
• studio "Rhythm" - development of dance and communication skills in the process of teaching dance;
• master classes in the Domovenok studio, when children learn to cook and this brings them great delight, and at the same time, the center’s specialists give advice on proper nutrition;
• sports section “Movement - Life”, where there is tennis, football, mini-football and physical training;
• carpentry and plumbing workshop, where children learn some simple everyday things.

All family specialists have higher education and are internally motivated to help people. In the course of their work, the department’s specialists improve their professional skills.

Who can participate in the program?

All families who are faced with problems that prevent them from caring for their child or taking him to kindergarten can participate in the program. In addition, parents of children with special needs, as well as children with problems with communication and behavior, can take a “respite”. Specialists from the department of social support for families help to collect a package of necessary documents and provide it to the department of social protection of the population of the region, where a decision is made about the family’s need to participate in the “Respite” program. After receiving permission, an agreement is concluded and work begins within the framework of an individual plan for the provision of social services for each family in accordance with the given issues.

Difficulties in implementing the program

“The result always depends on only one thing - parents’ awareness of their problem,” says the head of the department, Svetlana Pavlovna Uvarova. - Moms and dads sometimes assume that the child’s problem is his problem. There are situations when parents come and lay out the child’s problems, blaming only him for this and without thinking about their participation in their appearance. It was as if he lived and was raised on his own, and they had nothing to do with it. Not every parent can look at relationship issues from the other side. And this is the biggest difficulty, so the main task is to change the child-parent relationship, and not to remake the child.”

Vladlena Vorona

Zhenya and Sasha came from a walk. Nurses take them out of their strollers and carefully place them in their cribs. Both children have very “severe” diagnoses. They can dress, eat, and walk only with the help of an outsider. Most often, this person is the mother.

Every mother knows that caring for a seriously ill child is not easy work. But when a child is terminally ill from birth, it is a thousand times more difficult. Seemingly simple things like making repairs, going on vacation, or simply spending time for yourself or other family members or your husband are an almost impossible task.

Social respite

Two years ago, parents of special needs children had the opportunity to entrust the care of their child to a professional service. It is called respis, which means “social respite.” This project appeared thanks to the joint work of the Orthodox help service “Mercy” and the Martha and Mary Convent of Mercy.

Respis is a joint project of the Orthodox aid service “Mercy” and the Martha and Mary Convent. Photo: AiF/ Alexey Vissarionov

“Almost all families in which a sick child is growing up need register assistance,” I am sure Head of the register Natalya Benova. — As a rule, such families do not have free personal time - their whole life is focused on caring for the child. And such a social respite as our respis provides parents with the opportunity to relax.”

The Respis is located on the territory of the Marfo-Mariinskaya Monastery. There are 6 beds in total. Parents can leave their child on the register only once a year and for no more than a month. Cystic fibrosis, cerebral palsy, Rett syndrome, intractable epilepsy, amyotrophy - this is only an incomplete list of diagnoses for patients in the pediatric register. His patients are forced to live on medications, they need special care and rehabilitation means.

Almost all families with a sick child need help. Photo: AiF/ Alexey Vissarionov

“There are a little more than 60 children on the register every year. Those families who have visited us at least once sign up in advance. As of today, we have already planned out the entire year of 2017 and have a separate list of those parents who are ready to bring their child to us if someone suddenly refuses,” says Natalya Benova.

Of course, few parents immediately decide to leave their child in the care of strangers. Therefore, mothers have the opportunity to spend the first time in the register with their child.

“Parents believe, and they are, of course, to some extent right, that no one else can take care of their child like that - feed him, talk to him, calm him down. Therefore, the first time they come to us and leave their child, they call a lot and come often,” says the head of the register. “But then they realize that no one hurts their child here, the child eats well, is looked after like at home, at least no worse, and the parents stop worrying and freely leave their children in the future.”

The child is on guard 24 hours a day. Photo: AiF/ Alexey Vissarionov

Ease suffering

Zhenya and Sasha are here without their parents. They simply don’t have them - they are pupils of an orphanage, awaiting surgery in one of the capital’s clinics. Perhaps the respis is today the only place where they are truly cared for with maternal warmth.

“Sasha, you can’t bite your fingers,” the register employee gently says to the child. - You are hungry? Now it will be lunch!” The baby smiles and tries to blow a kiss.

Respis is to a greater extent not a medical institution, but a social institution. Photo: AiF/ Alexey Vissarionov

Both children have cerebral palsy: the boy has stopped epilepsy, and the girl has constant seizures. Sasha reacts to intonations, tries to communicate, but sees nothing. But his roommate, 7-year-old Zhenya, does not make contact. The baby developed normally until she was three years old, until she was injured by her own mother while under the influence of drugs. Since then, the girl has closed herself off.

The need for registers is great

The census is another confirmation that seriously ill children can be helped, even though they cannot be completely cured. These 4 weeks a year that a child can spend in the registry are, although a short period of time, but a huge help for the family. “It’s all completely free for families. The respis works on donations from caring people,” says the head of the respis, Natalya Benova. “All we have are private donations, an account and regular donors who transfer funds so that the register exists. Maintaining a register, employee salaries, food - all this requires large expenses.”

The respis is supported by donations. Photo: AiF/ Alexey Vissarionov

Residents of any city in Russia, regardless of religion, can nominate a child for inclusion in the register of the Marfo-Mariinsky Monastery. Parents will be provided not only with the respite they need after many years of fighting their child’s incurable illness, but also with medical advice on how to properly care for their child and what position to choose so that he can sit or lie comfortably. And the child himself will change the environment and receive help from professional psychologists, play therapists and exercise therapy specialists.

Parents leave positive reviews about the registration. Photo: AiF/ Alexey Vissarionov

“The need for registers in our country is very great, this is a sought-after service,” says Natalya Benova, “but in order for registers to appear in our country in the regions, we need to create palliative departments for children, children’s hospices, public, private, private state ones, then more people in need will receive help. In fact, a lot can be done for children with cerebral palsy, amyotrophy and other incurable diseases. Their lives can not only be made easier, but also significantly extended with proper care, habilitation and psychological support.”

Our “Respite” program runs on Sundays. Children, teenagers and young adults with special needs come to us for four hours and stay without their parents with our volunteers. The goal of “Respite” is to give parents a little time that they can spend only on themselves. Some kids are lucky enough to go to school or college, but mostly these are young people with very severe disabilities who are not accepted anywhere, so they sit at home all the time. For them, this is the only opportunity for communication and socialization, and for parents - to be without the child and relax at least 2 times a month.

The children are brought to the treatment center and gradually enter the playroom. It is clear that they missed each other and are glad to meet, they sit in a circle. Teacher Sasha takes the guitar and hands out musical instruments to the children: tambourines, maracas. At the “Circle” everyone greets each other, sings songs, then goes into the hall to sing and dance.

Robert does not reach the hall and remains standing on the landing. Bob is 18 years old; he has been studying at the Center for Clinical Practice since childhood. He has autism, he does not use speech and practically does not communicate with others. He seems to be in his own world, swaying, periodically screaming and listening to the echo. “Bob has difficulty walking through doors and moving from one room to another. He’s generally a very difficult person, it’s not easy to establish contact with him,” says volunteer Alina, “I’m not quite able to do this yet. Here, I’ll try to lure him with the sounds of the flute.”

Alina takes out a flute and plays a quiet melody. Bob stops swaying and freezes, takes a few quick steps and stops next to Alina, bends down and listens to the sounds of the flute. Then he screams something, as if answering the flute, and, just as suddenly, he turns around and returns back to the stairs. “It’s still important for Bob to come here. Although he does not directly participate in common life, he is still nearby and perceives it,” says Alina. You can see how happy he is when he meets Zhenya and Rita, whom he has known since childhood. For them it is an opportunity to communicate.

Bob lives with his grandmother, she has taken care of him since birth. Robert's grandmother says he has developed some social skills. At home, he learned to eat himself, brew his own food, and even wash the dishes. Robert is also a very good drawer.

The children and their companions gather for a walk around the territory of the Center. Some young people stay to help prepare lunch. “Here is Zhenya. When I first joined the group, I thought: how difficult it is to work with her. And now we have become friends, she is so beautiful, I love her very much,” says teacher Tanya. Zhenya is a very sensitive and gentle girl, she also loves Tanya, smiles at her, sometimes hugs her, walking hand in hand with Tanya around the Center for Curative Pedagogy gives her great pleasure. For Marriage's parents, "Respite" is the only opportunity to relax.

Lyuba goes for a walk around the territory of the center with volunteer Igor. It is clear that she recognizes herself as a young lady, she wants to listen to beautiful music and dance. Igor puts on music from the musical “Notre Dame de Paris” and they dance to it right on the street. Lyuba is completely happy.

Nastya is 17 years old, she lives with her mother. It’s very difficult for my mother to be with her: the girl is having a hard time going through adolescence. When Nastya is at home, she does not let her mother leave her side at all, she protests even if her mother closes the door to the bathroom. According to group leader Alena, mom is very tired of this situation. It is very important for both Nastya and her mother that they have time when they can be alone. One day Nastya’s mother looked very tired when she brought her daughter to us. After 4 hours, she returned for Nastya, very satisfied and calm, and said: “Thank you very much, at least I calmly washed my hair!”

Varya is 16 years old, she has cerebral palsy, and she gets around in a wheelchair. She has been studying at the Center since childhood and is now studying at school. “I’m here as a volunteer. I know how everything works here and I explain to the other guys how to behave,” Varya says proudly. There are also several other adults with special needs who are quite well socialized; they come to the “Respite to help. This is very great for them, because they feel needed and really help with those guys who have more severe disabilities. In addition, this is also an opportunity for young people to socialize. For example, Andrei Druzhinin, with autism, comes to accompany him on the piano during the rehearsal conducted by our tireless Sasha at the very end of “Respite”. Sasha decided to stage a musical with the guys at the end of the year. The young people rehearse their roles with enthusiasm. We are looking forward to the premiere!

Goals

1. Improving the quality of life and strengthening families raising children with disabilities by organizing the continuous and ongoing work of the “Respite” group

Tasks

1. Organize an environment for the Respite group, including a games room, sleeping area, dining room and hygiene room.
2. Organize the work of the "Respite" group, including the formation of a material and technical base, provision of personnel, food, and security.
3. Create a database of games for children with MSD that can be played in the evening, with the support of a play therapist.
4. Provide an opportunity for families raising children with MSD to attend the “Respite” group free of charge, including night shifts.

Justification of social significance

BREATHTE

BREATHTE

1. A short stop, a short rest to catch your breath, take a breath. He drove the horse without giving him a break.

3. trans. A break in the armed struggle, conditions under which it is possible to work peacefully (neol.). “Lenin told us more than once that the respite we had won from the capitalist states might turn out to be short-lived.” Stalin .

Ushakov's Explanatory Dictionary. D.N. Ushakov. 1935-1940.

See what “BREATH” is in other dictionaries:

See stop... Synonym dictionary

BREATHTE, and, women. 1. A short break to catch your breath, take a breath. Chase after someone without a break. Give someone a break. 2. transfer Break in what n. activities that allow you to gather strength. P. in a dispute. Dictionary… … Ozhegov's Explanatory Dictionary

respite- rus respite (f) eng rest pause fra pause (f) de récupération deu Erholungspause (f) spa pausa (f) … Occupational safety and health. Translation into English, French, German, Spanish

respite- BREATHTE, and, plural. shek, dat. shkam, f Peren. A period of time during which work is briefly interrupted so that you can gather your strength and relax; Syn.: Coll. smoke break, break. There was a time when there was a short time in rural work... ... Explanatory dictionary of Russian nouns

G. 1. Inhale and exhale deeply when breathing is difficult. 2. transfer Temporary cessation of any action or state; rest while working. Ephraim's explanatory dictionary. T. F. Efremova. 2000... Modern explanatory dictionary of the Russian language by Efremova

Respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite, respite (Source: “Full accented paradigm according to A. A. Zaliznyak”) ... Forms of words

respite- in front of the mouse, and, genus. p.m. h. shek... Russian spelling dictionary

respite- (1 g); pl. front/shki, R. front/shek... Spelling dictionary of the Russian language

AND; pl. genus. shek, dat. shkam; and. 1. Restoring normal breathing. Pronounce without respite, with respite. Drink without a break, with a break. 2. Stop, break for rest during what l. work being performed. A protracted P.P. at work... encyclopedic Dictionary

respite- take a break from the action... Verbal compatibility of non-objective names

Books

• Respite (translated from Italian by Dmitrieva E.; foreword by Solonovich E.), Levi P.. ...
• A break. Thanks for the light. Spring with chipped corner. Stories, Mario Benedetti. The prose of the greatest Uruguayan writer has been published in our country more than once. The “Favorites” volume includes three novels: “Thank you for the light”, “Respite”, “Spring with a broken corner” (the last two…