The first sexual intercourse is an exciting process for men and women. This has been the case at all times. True, the attitude towards virginity in different countries and different centuries was different. Some nationalities attached a mystical meaning to virginity (only virgins were priests or keepers of the cult of the gods). In other countries, innocence served as a kind of "quality check". Somewhere innocence meant shame (a signal that a guy or a girl is not popular with the opposite sex).

In modern times, virginity is treated more simply. It is not given special social significance, the boys and girls themselves have the right to decide when they have sexual intercourse. However, this led to the fact that young people are confused, they have questions, the answers to which they have to look for themselves.

In this article, we have collected common questions about first sex, its meaning for men and women. Experts - psychologists, therapists, gynecologists, urologists, sexologists - will give answers. You will find out how long sexual intercourse lasts for the first time, which position is best suited, how many guys and girls experience pleasure from the first sex, and whether it is possible to get pregnant.

Answers to the main questions

• Is there always blood?

According to surveys of gynecologists, women only in 7 out of 10 cases with the first sexual intercourse bleeding. Moreover, in 15% of girls, hymen rupture occurs before the first intercourse. This can happen due to excessive physical exertion (when the child is sent to the sports section) or when a teenage girl begins to use inappropriate tampons during her period. If, after all, the hymen is intact, how much blood is released? More often a couple of drops. Very rarely, a girl has severe bleeding.

• Does the girl always have pain?

Not. The main condition is that sexual intercourse should be preceded by preliminary preparation so that both the man and the girl reach a high level of arousal. Only because of the excitement of partners, a woman may not achieve excitement. Artificial lubricants will come to the rescue - lubricants sold in pharmacies. How much do lubricants cost? About 200-300 rubles is a reasonable price, so everyone can buy a lubricant.

• Can you define a virgin outwardly?

Psychologists assure: there are no external signs of a partner's innocence. If the girl does not bleed, then after the first sexual intercourse, the man may not guess her innocence. In some cases, girls, ashamed to admit their virginity, say that the blood appeared due to the onset of menstruation (which, by the way, is true). So if a man or a woman does not want to admit that they are inexperienced, then, being confident and courageous in actions, they will not be able to give themselves away.

• Is there a better pose?

The classic missionary position is considered the best option for debut sex for men and women. Sexologists believe that this is due to psychological insecurity: the missionary position is the simplest, if desired, it allows you to hide the body. In fact, there are no physical restrictions for postures. True, one should not set up sophisticated experiments from the Kama Sutra - if the experiment fails, a serious blow will be dealt to vanity (inexperienced couples experience failures more acutely, not realizing that this is a one-time "failure", not a diagnosis).

• Sex won't work, won't you like it?

Statistics show: in every third case, a girl does not like the first sexual contact with a man. How many girls have an orgasm on first intercourse? Even less. Only 12% of virgins can experience orgasm. As for men, sexologists assure: in every sixth case, the first sex also does not give them the expected pleasure. Due to inexperience, excitement, an overabundance of hormones, premature ejaculation often occurs or intercourse lasts too little time. How many? On average, the debut act lasts 40–90 seconds. Getting the most out of sex and controlling time can only be gained by gaining experience.

• Risk of getting pregnant.

Surprisingly, in the modern world there are people who believe the myth that after the first sexual intercourse, pregnancy will not work. Someone is sure: a virgin woman's sperm are washed out with blood, as with menstruation (which, by the way, is not true - with menstruation, you can also conceive a child). Someone thinks that a virgin male has "immature" sperm. Both are nonsense. You can get pregnant with any sexual contact. This is why you should definitely use contraceptives when having sex.

• Choosing contraceptives.

Doctors advise using condoms. Condoms are easy to use and inexpensive (young girls and boys, as a rule, do not have the means for expensive protective equipment). Men are sometimes afraid that condoms will lose their erection (the reason is a decrease in sensitivity), they persuade a woman to use the method of interruption of sexual intercourse. This is not worth doing: due to inexperience, it is difficult for a guy to understand how long he can “hold out” before ejaculation. As for the complex methods of protection (pills, vaginal rings, calendar tracking of dates) - they are suitable for experienced couples.

// Selected issues of forensic medical examination. - Khabarovsk, 2000 - No. 3. - S. 62-63.

Some signs of former intercourse

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On some signs of a former sexual intercourse / Dmitrieva O.A., Shishkova D.S. // Selected issues of forensic medical examination. - Khabarovsk, 2000. - No. 3. - S. 62-63.

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V.V. Khokhlov and L.E. Kuznetsov in the "Guide to Forensic Medicine" 1998) write that the evidence and signs of sexual intercourse are: defloration, the presence of seminal fluid in the woman's genital tract, pregnancy, infection with venereal and diseases.

Sexual intercourse is understood as the insertion of a man's penis into a woman's vagina, while virgins may have defloration, i.e. violation of the integrity of the hymen. The sexual act is not a legal and not a criminal law concept, but a physiological act, possible only between persons and of different sexes, between a man and a woman (Comments to the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation, 1998).

However hymen intact can also be disturbed when solid blunt objects (stick, bottle) are inserted into the vagina, by the action of human fingers and even inside by vaginal tampons, especially when they are introduced to virgins and without first consulting a doctor. Thus, defloration is not an independent sign of previous intercourse.

Expression " the presence of seminal fluid in the genital tract of a woman"requires correction, because the question arises - where does the genital tract begin: from the labia majora or labia minora, from the vestibule of the vagina or from the hymen? Anatomical atlases of many generations divide the female genital organs into external and internal. And on those, and on other genitals organs can be found sperm. The authors believe that "the detection of semen in the contents of the vagina is an indisputable sign of former sexual intercourse" and further "evidence of former sexual intercourse is pregnancy." However, sperm can get into the vagina from its vestibule as a result of leakage after ejaculation, while pregnancy and infection with a venereal disease are possible.Consequently, none of these signs is reliable, much less indisputable, to determine the former sexual intercourse, and they must be taken into account only in aggregate, in accordance with the case materials.

Ejaculation on the eve of the vagina without copulation, i.e. without the introduction of the penis into the vagina, it is not sexual intercourse both in the medical and legal sense, and sperm cells through the vagina may well reach the external os of the uterus. Infection with a venereal disease can occur both during oral genital contact, petting, and debauchery, especially with contact and friction in the genital area.

The number of sexual crimes is growing steadily. We see the reasons for this in the following: early sexual development and early puberty, causing or provoking behavior, unfavorable environmental conditions (erotic films, leisure companies, staying at night on the city streets, lack of control over the behavior of adolescents, etc.) ...

In connection with the above, the conclusion of V.N. Kryukov (1990) that "although the integrity of the hymen is the main sign of sexual inviolability, its violation is not an absolutely indisputable sign of former sexual intercourse" seems more correct to us, and the opinion of A.R. Denkovsky and A.A. Matysheva (1976) that “the expert assessment of the damage found should be done very carefully, since there are no reliable signs of forced sexual intercourse".

Sexual life is an integral part of the relationship between men and women. Ideally, it should be bright and memorable, but for this there should be mutual understanding and harmony between partners. Of course, this is not easy to achieve, but it is possible. The main thing is to devote time to affection during intimacy, to take into account taste preferences and the duration of sexual intercourse. And, of course, candles, music and aromatic oils will not be superfluous. So what should be the average duration of intercourse in an ideal sex life?

Age and duration of sexual intercourse

The duration of sexual intercourse, according to experts, directly depends on your age. So during puberty, the time of an intimate relationship can be long, and even protracted, rather than in a later period of your life.

By about the age of 22, there is a sharp decline in sexual activity, and after 26, on the contrary, its rise occurs. This is due to a decrease in the level of sexuality in men in adulthood and to its instability in the early years.

What does average intercourse mean?

The average duration of sexual intercourse in men is a highly controversial component. The fact is that its value depends on the moment of the beginning and end of the calculation, as well as on the inclusion of preliminary kisses and caresses. For example, the most correct indicator is called the frictional stage during sexual intercourse.

He says that when determining the average, all actions of a man are taken as a basis, starting from the moment the penis is inserted into the vagina and up to the final stage of ejaculation. This takes into account the number of frictions (push-and-forward movements during sexual contact).

Duration of intercourse

Sexual contact is short, long, and average. The shortest intimacy is considered to last one minute and forty-five seconds (about 65 frictions). The longest is three minutes and thirty-five seconds, which is approximately 270 frictions.

In turn, the average duration of intercourse is two minutes and twenty-three seconds. And the entire period from the introduction of the male genital organ to ejaculation is normally about 1.5-5 minutes.

The most ridiculous sex records

The longest intercourse is considered the record set by the balzac-age porn star Mae West and her ex-boyfriend. According to the erotic movie star herself, the whole process took place outside the set and took the couple about 15 hours.

The shortest intimate relationship is registered in the Guinness Book of Records, but by no means performed by people. As it turned out, the record belongs to mosquitoes, which are able to mate in just three seconds. What is the average duration of sexual intercourse in women, read on.

How long does intercourse take for women?

Female sexual intercourse directly depends on the man who plays the primary role in it. According to experts, for full satisfaction, beautiful ladies need to receive stimulation of erogenous zones from their partner for 10-15 minutes.

Sexual intercourse, average duration: what does it depend on?

Based on the conclusions of experienced sexologists, the duration of copulation between women and men depends on many different factors, of which the following can be distinguished:

• the mood of both partners;
• the well-being and physical condition of both partners;
• the presence of unpleasant and painful sensations (if any);
• the speed of excitability and temperament of partners;
• physiological characteristics of men and women (the sexual constitution directly affects the sexual intercourse itself, the average duration of which may well depend on the size and capabilities of the partners' genitals);
• the length of preliminary sexual caresses;
• abuse of tobacco and alcohol products;
• proximity and onset of "women's days" and ovulation;
• the number of approaches and so on.

It is also important to know about how long the break between sexual play was for partners. For example, if a man's duration of sexual abstinence was a month, then with close contact he will not be able to hold back for a long time. As a result, ejaculation will happen very quickly. Recall that the average duration of intercourse is more than two minutes.

Long intercourse: benefit or harm

It is a mistake to believe that the longer sexual intercourse between partners, the better. On the contrary, long coitus tires and dulls sexuality. It generates a certain saturation and, as a result, apathy for further carnal pleasures.

In addition, the matter is not even in the duration of the process itself, but in the mutual satisfaction of the partners. So some women are able to get up to 3-4 orgasms in one sexual contact. A short period of intercourse is also not the norm, as it does not bring positive emotions to the woman. During this time, she simply does not have time to relax and enjoy sexual caresses. Therefore, the optimal solution is to take into account the average duration of intercourse.

How to maximize the process time?

Often, both partners agree on one thing: the time of their sexual intimacy should be maximized. What can be done for this? First, one of the easiest and cheapest options to solve the problem is to use condoms made of very dense material or containing a special anesthetic compound. You can also use a regular condom with a small drop of ice in it.

Secondly, your average duration of intercourse will increase significantly if you do not endlessly think about the process itself. Better to focus on your work or think of spectacular romantic paraphernalia for a pleasant evening.

Thirdly, you can see a doctor who will relieve a man of excess foreskin. According to experts, such an operation will increase the time of your sexual contact by about 2-3 times.

Fourthly, if you are thinking about how to increase the duration of intercourse, use special means and drugs. Modern medicine allows to increase the contact time with the help of tablets, creams, gels and other means.

In addition, rapid intercourse may be a consequence, not the very cause. Therefore, for a start, it is worthwhile to understand and contact specialists, for example, sexologists. Sometimes stress can be the cause, so consultation with a psychologist will also not be superfluous. In short, first carry out "work on mistakes", find out all the causes and consequences, and then start looking for ways out of this situation.

The very concept of "average duration of sexual intercourse" is not entirely clear. First, we must agree on what exactly we count. The term "sexual intercourse" can be understood in a broad and narrow sense.

What is "intercourse"?

In sexual intimacy (sexual intercourse “in the broad sense”), certain stages are distinguished. Namely:

1) foreplay,

2) frictional stage;

3) orgasm;

4) the final stage (postludes).

During foreplay, sexual arousal increases. People of different temperaments, ages, etc. it can have completely different duration and energy (sometimes it can be practically absent). The same can be said for the final stage.

Everything is so individual that the only stage that, in principle, can be measured is the frictional stage, which begins with penetration, that is, the introduction of the male penis into the vagina, and ends with ejaculation - ejaculation.

It is this period that is often referred to as "sexual intercourse" (although this is not true). It is about how long this "sexual intercourse in the narrow sense" should last further and will be discussed.

What does the statistics say about the duration of intercourse?

It should be borne in mind that the duration of intercourse can be measured both in time units - minutes and seconds, and in the number of frictions - different men can perform frictions at different speeds.

So research shows that in the vast majority of cases, sexual intercourse lasts from 1 minute 45 seconds, or about 65 frictions, to 3 minutes 37 seconds, or about 270-275 frictions. The average is 2 minutes 24 seconds. The conventional norm is the range from 1.5 to 5 minutes.

Sexual intercourse ends with ejaculation, that is, ejaculation, accompanied by a male orgasm: the continuation of frictions after this becomes impossible due to the disappearance of the erection of the penis. Thus, just the mentioned time, that is, on average - 2 minutes 24 seconds, is enough for a man to “finish”.

A woman, on the other hand, needs significantly longer stimulation to reach orgasm. Male and female organisms differ significantly in this respect.

For most men, especially long foreplay and the final stage are not necessary. By itself, a normal male orgasm lasts 5-10 seconds. The vast majority of men are not able to experience more than 1 orgasm during intercourse.

Thus, by and large, apart from these 5-10 seconds a man “does not need anything”. The rest of the frictional stage, and other stages, are "intended", rather, for women.

Even taking into account the need for some time for the increase in arousal, if the entire sexual intercourse lasts 20 seconds or half a minute, then this will be quite enough for a man to get an orgasm and sexual release. This means that it is for a man that any duration of sexual intercourse will be biologically normal.

As for women, most of the surveyed women received an orgasm 3-4 minutes after the start of frictions, on average - after 3.5 minutes. In doing so, however, there were significant variations associated with personal characteristics.

In different women, intercourse could last from 1 to 11 minutes - if you count from the moment of the first penetration to the onset of the first orgasm. It is clear that only very few men are able not to "discharge" within 5 minutes of the frictional stage (what can we say about 11!).

But at the same time, all surveyed women experienced orgasm, if not always, then quite often. This happens because human sexuality, and indeed the human psyche in general, is a very flexible system. Insufficiently long intercourse is compensated by a longer foreplay. Practice shows that two adults are almost always able to adapt to each other.

It should be understood that nature had good reasons to arrange the female sexual sphere differently from the male one. If in men an orgasm occurs directly from the friction of the head of the penis against the walls of the vagina during frictions, then in women the walls of the vagina are almost insensitive in this regard.

This is not surprising: if the walls of the vagina were as permeated with nerve endings as the head of the penis, then the woman would die from painful shock during childbirth, when the vagina was exposed to a very strong traumatic effect. For this reason, nature could not “make” female sexuality “mirror” in relation to male sexuality.

The center of female sexual sensitivity is the clitoris. It is located slightly above the entrance to the vagina and is not injured during childbirth. It is the direct or indirect stimulation of the clitoris that leads to orgasm in a woman.

Since the increase in arousal in women with indirect stimulation of the clitoris takes longer than in men with direct stimulation of the glans penis, a woman's orgasm comes later than a man. True, for such difficulties, nature rewarded a woman with a longer orgasm, as well as the ability to experience an orgasm several times during one sexual intercourse.

But it is precisely for this reason that the abnormally short attainment of orgasm by a man creates problems for women: despite all the mentioned flexibility of human sexuality, a woman often cannot adapt to an overly short sexual intercourse. This problem should be solved with the help of specialists.

What determines the duration of intercourse

The timing of ejaculation in men can depend on many factors. First of all - from the physiological and anatomical features. Different people have a different degree of sensitivity of nerve endings: accordingly, they need different times to reach orgasm. For some men, too long foreplay "warms up" so much that later sexual intercourse continues for a few seconds.

Also, the moral and psychological state of a man plays an important role: nervous exhaustion, lack of sleep, general irritation, increased emotionality (or, conversely, emotional decline) can lead both to a more rapid completion of sexual intercourse, and, conversely, to its unnecessarily long duration. In general, men with high sexual arousal often tend to have intercourse lasting less than 2 minutes.

The age of a man is also of great importance: very young people often do not yet have a special sexual experience, and therefore they are not yet accustomed to properly controlling their body.

In men, the period of youthful hypersexuality ends at about 22 years of age. After this, a compensatory decline in sexuality occurs, lasting until about 26 years.

Then sexuality again slightly increases and reaches a plateau: it remains more or less constant throughout the subsequent active sexual life of a man (in the absence of diseases of the genitourinary system). It begins to decrease only during the period of male menopause, which occurs in different men approximately between 45 and 60 years.

At this time, sexual activity decreases, various dysfunctions may occur, including premature ejaculation or, conversely, its delay. In the presence of serious diseases of the genitourinary system, complete impotence can occur. After the end of the climacteric transition, sex life returns to normal, although usually at a much lower level. It is during the period of youthful hypersexuality or menopause with the duration of sexual intercourse that there can be problems.

The regularity of sexual intercourse is also important: after a period of prolonged abstinence, the first sexual intercourse may be too short. With active sexual activity, on the contrary, the average time of intercourse may increase.

It also matters whether sexual contact occurs in an established couple or in a newly created one. Practice shows that intercourse in an established couple is usually shorter, but at the same time, both partners quickly and effectively reach orgasm. Here it is a matter of "habit" - a conditioned reflex.

If the body “knows” that after certain actions an orgasm always comes (simply because it has already happened dozens and hundreds of times), then it quickly and effectively prepares for it.

On the contrary, after the separation of long-term spouses, it happens that for a long time they cannot then start a normal sex life with new partners: simply because they are no longer so young, and the habit-reflex no longer simplifies the achievement of orgasm, as it was with the former husband or wife.

Possible causes of too short intercourse

Possible reasons for having intercourse too quickly are as follows:

• hypersensitivity of the glans penis - congenital or arising from previous diseases;
• mental disorders associated with unsuccessful sexual intercourse before;
• vesiculitis or prostatitis;
• inflammatory processes in the organs of the genitourinary system;
• hormonal imbalance - pathological or natural age-related;
• diseases of the central nervous system, spinal cord or brain injury.

To provide effective assistance, it is necessary to understand what cause or their combination caused the problem. Not always, but very often the problems are primarily of a psychological nature. However, they can also lead to a similar effect. In such cases, it is better to immediately contact a specialist.

Possible causes of excessively prolonged intercourse

Too long intercourse is by no means as good a sign as is sometimes thought. A pathological delay in ejaculation can eventually lead a man to be unable to experience orgasm at all. The main reasons for such a violation may be as follows:

• diabetes;
• inflammatory processes in the genitourinary system;
• diseases or injuries of the central nervous system;
• alcohol or other drug abuse;
• pathology of the reproductive system.

In addition, certain medications may play a role. In particular, drugs that change blood pressure have side effects on the sexual sphere. It is known after all that even the famous "Viagra" was discovered during the search for a means to lower the pressure ...

How to normalize the duration of intercourse?

First of all, you should think carefully about whether this is necessary. Despite the fact that the length of intercourse between 1.5 and 5 minutes is officially considered the norm, it is considered inappropriate to intervene in the situation when it lasts from 45 seconds to 12 minutes: deviations from the norm in these cases are not so significant, and to adapt to lead a normal sex life in such conditions are usually quite realistic.

But if treatment is still necessary, then only a specialist can help. Usually, the following methods are used to make intercourse last longer:

1. Treatment of existing diseases of the genitourinary system, if any (infections, inflammation, etc.).

2. Psychotherapy (possibly also chemotherapy) of existing nervous disorders affecting the sexual sphere.

3. Hormone therapy (in particular, for dysfunctions during menopause).

4. Operative, including surgical intervention in order to decrease or increase the sensitivity of the glans penis. There are different methods here: from circumcision of the foreskin to creating a layer of hyaluronic acid under the skin of the head (using injections).

5. The use of additional means during sexual intercourse: thick rubber condoms to reduce sensitivity or a variety of sexual "toys" to increase arousal.

Currently, methods of therapy for sexual dysfunctions associated with a violation of the normal duration of sexual intercourse are well developed.

Often men have an opinion about how long sexual intercourse lasts based on various films of an erotic nature. But porn actors are able to have sex for a long time, because they use special drugs before filming. At the same time, many men believe that ideal sex should last a long time, otherwise a woman will not get an orgasm. Of course, the statement “fast is not good” is partly correct. But this does not mean that intercourse should be too long.

Ideal sex does not depend on the duration, but on the satisfaction of both partners. Everyone should have an orgasm not necessarily at the same time, but with a small margin.

The duration of intercourse is the time from the beginning of copulation to ejaculation, after which the penis becomes soft. Preparing for sex and foreplay do not count as they can take quite a long time, depending on the characteristics and sexual preferences of the partners.

What determines the duration of sex

How long intercourse lasts depends on a number of factors. Let's consider some of them:

• The position chosen for sex has a particular influence. It is easier for a man to restrain ejaculation when a woman is given the main role. In such positions, the man shows less physical activity, so he can control the situation. After all, if he has to control his movements, monitor the positions of the bodies, then it will be much more difficult to control ejaculation. That is why most men prefer the “rider” position rather than “dogi - style” or “missionary”, because in the first case they only listen to their feelings.
• In addition, the duration of intercourse in men depends on their age. It so happens that young men during the first copulation often lose control, so sex lasts only a few seconds. Some even worry so much that they lose an erection.
• Much also depends on the woman. She should be relaxed in bed, not afraid to take different poses. In this case, sexual contact will last for a long time and bring a lot of positive emotions and pleasant sensations.
• Equally important is the emotional and physical condition of a man. Overwork can cause ejaculation to happen too quickly. Sometimes a man is so tired that an erection disappears during intercourse. Drinking small amounts of alcohol can help slow the onset of orgasm.

Average duration of sex

It is impossible to say exactly how long sexual intercourse should last. Indeed, for each man, this value is strictly individual. But the average sex length is 3 to 10 minutes. Moreover, sexual intercourse is considered normal, which lasts at least 90 seconds. In the case of a faster onset of ejaculation, the guy is diagnosed with accelerated ejaculation. Sometimes a man ends prematurely because he has had abstinence for an extended period.

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The guy's first sex deserves special attention. Due to the inexperience of a young man, the time of intercourse rarely exceeds 2 minutes. For a girl, first sex can last much longer. After all, the rupture of the hymen rarely happens the first time. Therefore, a man has to insert his penis into the girl's vagina several times before depriving her of her virginity. On average, this takes about 30-40 minutes.

The effect of prolonged sex on the body

It turns out that the longest intercourse for most men rarely exceeds 10 minutes. And that's okay. After all, sex that lasts up to 20 minutes or more is considered a deviation from a medical point of view. While some experts, on the contrary, are supporters of prolonged copulation. In their opinion, the longer sexual contact lasts, the more hormones necessary for the prevention of various diseases (cephalgia, obesity, psychological pathologies) will be released in the partners' bodies.

In addition, long intercourse has a positive effect on the cardiovascular system, reducing the likelihood of atherosclerosis, hypertension, and heart disease. Although, if sex lasts longer than 20 minutes, the man's vas deferens may become inflamed. Moreover, due to too long intercourse, women complain of a burning sensation in the vagina. And prolonged hard sex can lead to tears and cracks in a woman's genitals.

Ways to prolong an erection

Many men are not satisfied with the length of intercourse. But experts say that sex is normal, during which a man manages to perform 70 frictions. To learn how to keep an erection longer, a guy must make love more often.

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